Temple Guardian: Which Pokemon Gen is the Best?

*edit: There are mysterious huge blank spaces. I don't know why it's doing that. It only is effecting this post

Aaahhhh....Pokemon. Whether you like it or not, the series is still going strong. Games, anime, manga, toys, cards, lunch boxes...it's here and up in your face. Over the years, Pokemon has had changes in it's system. I mean, back in the day, you could only give your Pokemon steroids to get stronger. Now they get to have wild sex, share steroids with other Pokemon, and get names in languages you don't understand. So I'm going to count down the Pokemon generations, from worst to best. The 3 main games only. No Stadium, no Pinball, no Ranch, no Mystery Dungeon, no Firered and Leafgreen, none of that. *Note, I haven't really played Emerald or Platinum.

The Ruby, Sapphire, and Emerald generation of the Gameboy Advance. (like I said, no FR or LG) There is no really "bad" Pokemon game, but there are those that suffer. Pokemon went through an uncomfortable jump between this gen and the last. Even in the anime (fucking got rid of Misty) something just...happened. The Pokemon began to be....very boring...and uncreative. I mean, alright. The previous gen had HootHoot, a rip of Pidgey. But HootHoot had cool abilities Pidgey couldn't have. HootHoot would evolve and get dark and evil. Taillow just...is a Pidgey. An ugly Pidgey at that. It looks like a normal bird. Then it evolves and becomes fat. I mean, I guess stats and stuff change, but's a really unimaginative Pokemon. It's not just Taillow either, it's all the new Pokemon! Out of all of them, I only liked Absol. The others were just...blah.

Look at that fat bitch! Slaking... I hate himmmm. Besides the fact he's used by stupid Norman...take a look. Looks familiar doesn't he? That's because he's Snorlax. Why do we need 2 lazy Pokemon? And that...whatever a Breloom is. The legendary Pokemon don't help either. We already had 11 of them. (I counted Mew and Celebi) That was already pushing it. But R/S/E added Regirock, Regice, Registeel, Latios, Latios, Kyogre, Groundon, Rayqueza, Jirachi, and Deoxys. That's 10 by itself! In 1 generation!!! That means by now, we have 21 legendaries. Goddamn. They must spend WEEKS at church worshiping all these Pokemon. Not to mention most are boring to look at. I mean..look..Feebas is just Magikarp. It's just copy pasta now. To make it worse, they cut out TONS of original Pokemon, so you're stuck with the losers because you can't trade from this from Gold and Silver.

Other than that...I suppose it's ok....the music is ok. The land is pretty bland, nothing sticks out other than the town on the trees. I don't really care about the Elite Four or whose the main boss. All the 3 Team's introduced suck. They are so cliche and are blant rip offs of Team Rocket. They aren't even a real threat. Nobody cares about the universe or the ocean. But if you touch my Pokemon, BITCH BETTER BACK UP! That is the difference, Team Rocket is believable. I basically played this and never touched it again...only going back for Absol. But again, you can transfer Pokemon you do like to this...and Emerald greatly improved on it. However, it just draws too much criticism. Hoenn isn't that popular. It introduces butt loads of poor Pokemon...just bleh. Oh, and when you start out, how come you are riding in the back with all the stuff? I mean...shouldn't you be in the front...driving with your mom? Anyway...

The Diamond, Pearl, and Platinum generation for the DS. I sweated a little when I was buying this one. I was afraid it would be too much like Ruby and Sapphire. Happily, they corrected a bunch of mistakes...but threw in new ones. The new Pokemon aren't as retarded (although they were still dropped on their heads as babies)...and there are fewer. They put back old wild Pokemon, along with wild baby Pokemon. Again, too many damn legendaries. 14 fucking ones were added. Jesus Christ...I don't even care about the stupid legendaries anymore. Why are these even considered legendary if there are so many? Anyway...

The land is even more confusing this time around. The day night system was brought back...but it's barely noticeable. The Elite Four is more memorable, but...they are too easy. I blasted through them, and through Cynthia in my 1st try. Cynthia is a very awesome Champion though. The rival in the last game was... meh, but not worth mentioning. This time around, he took the same drugs the Pokemon from Ruby and Sapphire took. "OHMYGODASALEATKOHLS*runs*" is what he's like. Annoying, and stupid, way too easy. No sense of challenge. Team Galactic is...ok. They are better than the previous ones, but still full of fails. Oh no, scary space people with bowl cuts! Some of the Pokemon are annoying to find too. Like...you have to swim in a lake and at a certain square or it wouldn't appear or something...it was lame.

The sickest thing they changed was how your Pokedex registers Pokemon. It always made sense to me having to catch them. I mean, that's just too easy looking at them and it's like "Oh!" But no. They changed it. To register Pokemon now, you just get a in a battle with them. Your "Pokemon" count goes up, even though you don't own them. To get access to the Pal Park (so you can get Pokemon from previous games) you have to "see" all the Sinnoh Pokemon. How lame. Maybe that's why they introduced those ridiculous methods of finding Pokemon. So it feels useless to actually capture them now. What's the point if you can't show off?

Despite these, it really was an improvement over Ruby and Sapphire. It's enjoyable, and the touch screen never even has to be used. (no no-sense gimmicky shit in there *glares at Dawn of Sorrow*) The battles are nice, the new Pokemon are better. Platinum, again, improved all this. I was planning to get Platinum until I heard about HeartGold and SoulSilver, so I'm waiting to get those 2 first. There isn't much to say anymore about it. It's a pretty decent Pokemon game. (except for fucking Bidoof.)

The Blue, Red, and Yellow generation for the Gameboy. Ho' boy. Where it all began, when people worshiped Pikachu's feet and nobody knew they were on Kanto. The entire thing was new to us. Every single Pokemon is cool as shit. Clefairy? Awesome. Jigglypuff? Super awesome. The anime made them even more likable. Chansey? Awesome if you aren't fighting her because she never DIES. There were 4 legendaries, and maybe a 5th one under that damn truck we can never move!! We hated Gary because he was always an asshat. The ghosts that we couldn't identify were scary. Missingno and infinite masterballs and rare candies were the shit. Snorlax was a bastard, and it was always fun in Glitch City.

Now...despite all this. There was a problem. At the end of the game....that was...it basically. You didn't want to lose your data by starting over...or you'd have to buy a new game (or make some friends) to get Eevee evolutions. What was there to do? Nothing. You couldn't even level your Pokemon to 99 without getting bored as crap. I only cheated my way there. Did they not think "well, maybe it'd get boring at the end" We want more, more, more! There nobody left to fight except the Elite Four, but they get boring.

That's about all the criticism I have... Criticizing anything else would just be unfair. Like how Squirtle really looks odd? It was the first in the series. They hadn't established what he 100% looks like yet. Some filthy heads will attack the game based on the graphics. Seriously....I don't even like talking about graphics normally but it's a GAMEBOY game. Damn. In Yellow, they matched it up with the anime. They also improved various things, like getting all 3 starter Pokemon and Pikachu. What a deal.

Another question would be, are the remakes better than the originals? Looking at it sensibly, yes. FireRed is better than Red. There is loads more to do. However, most of us grew up with Red, so we'll vote for Red. But, FireRed makes it easier to level to 99. Then again, you can get Mew in Red... It's just a personal choice. I enjoy them both. They can both live in this world peacfully.

The Gold, Silver, and Crystal versions, for the Gameboy Color. No surprise here I guess. We only had 1 more to go. These are just...beautiful. They took what was great about Red and Blue...and made it BETTER. We had more, wonderful Pokemon. The best starters ever, the best land. It was simple, and memorable. The return of Team Rocket, a person we knew was the Champion, and we could even go BACK to Kanto! Baby Pokemon?! EGGS?! *passes out* Colored Pokemon? Poke'rus? Different balls? Day and Night? Different Pokemon at those times?! The rvial was a dickhole (and again, we had a connection with him because he is Giovanni's son) it was great. You even got to fight the Champion of Red and Blue with a scary fucking Pikachu. (Ash basically)

Crystal added animations, the battle tower, and the main course of Suicine. 6 new legendaries was pushing it...but the 3 dogs were so cool I didn't mind. You could choose to be a female. Swarms were added You could re-battle people and just argh. You could probably guess I creamed the walls when I heard about Heartgold and SoulSilver.

This generation added the greatest number of useful additions. Ruby added running...Diamond...we aren't sure yet because the next gen isn't out yet. The game is just...flawless. It only has 2 main problems, and both are not the game's fault. They cannot be avoided or foreseen. First off, the batteries die after 8 years or so. How was Nintendo suppose to know this? The best thing is to get it replaced by a professional, or be careful and do it yourself. Second, Kanto was quite empty. Again, the cartridge had limited space. Just be happy it's in there. It's extremely hard to get bored of this game. It's really difficult to get to 99, but it's easier than the previous game.

Of course you're free to disagree with me. I don't care, play whichever gen is your favorite. Gold and Silver have a special place in my heart. I never get tired of playing them...but it's scary because my batteries have been dying. FireRed was a wonderful remake. In fact, it's one of the few remakes I've ever liked. (I'm normally extremely against remakes. Ports ftw) So combining that awesomeness with the already awesome Gold and Silver is just...amazing. Pure. Amazement.

Temple Guardian

Which Pokemon Gen is the Best?

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