News and Bad Reviews: Grand Theft Auto 4

Posted on 12/26/2009 - ,

First: I know I didn't update at all on Thursday. I was busy, and tired, so I just decided not to. (It was Christmas Eve anyway) I know I didn't do anything for the holidays, I sorta...forgot. They snuck up so fast. Anyway, I don't have a specific date (I have no idea when actually) but I'll be posting a small comic each Monday, drawn by me. I'll announce it a week in advance when I'm going to put the 1st strip on. It's nothing complicated or with deep storylines (or any story really..) it's just a fun little thing. Also, I'm going to add 360 Xbox Market content and anything Steam does to the weekly PSN/Wii updates. I really should give that a name...I mean, PSN/Wii/360/Steam Updates is a pretty big title.

Anyway, I was talking with a homie the other day, about Saints Row. He brought up the fact that IGN gave Grand Theft Auto 4 a 10. I laughed and thought it was a joke.

He was serious

I won't link the entire thing, as it's too long for 7 pages of ass-kissing. The ONLY negative thing she (I think it's a she anyway) points out, is the cover. You sometimes un-stick from it at bad times. That gets what, a few sentences? Then you get paragraphs and paragraphs and saying how it isn't a problem or a big deal. So why even point it out?

"Grand Theft Auto IV is just as big a leap forward, though perhaps in subtler ways, and sets a new benchmark for open-world games." No it isn't. It's the exact same (or very similar) to other GTA's. A big leap forward is something that would change the series or the genre. Metroid is a wonderful example. Super Metroid alone change the entire Castlevania series. You can't compare Super Metroid to GTA 4. Not even close (beyond genre wise) I also know that she keeps pointing out the little things NPC's do. Like putting on blinkers and such. That is nice attention to detail and adds to the charm, but that alone gives it a 10? (yeah I know she mentions the missions and crap...but you did that in every single other GTA...)


A perfect score should be reserved for true master pieces. It should be near impossible to find any flaws. I'm pretty damn sure that GTA 4 has a lot more flaws than the "horrible unsticky cover!" The highest score I've given out was a 4.8 for Batman: Arkham Asylum. I could hardly find anything wrong with the game. I didn't give it a perfect score though. Although nothing was wrong with the game, there is always room for improvement. (that, and I don't just want to throw out perfect scores. Those are earned over time) I left that open. I expect to shit in my pants with "wow" when I play a perfect scored game. Or if it isn't a sudden reaction, I expect my pants to be slowly filled as I play the game. (Batman was the latter)

In the beginning, I posted some examples of 5's from me. Starcraft and Unreal Tournament were the examples I posted. Why those? Well, think, what's wrong with them? ....still thinking? Starting to get a headache? Of course you are! Why, sure you can nitpick, "Blah Starcraft needs moar music!" "Blah, Unreal Tournament 2004 is better!" But there is nothing truly wrong. (and I didn't pick 2004 for a 5 because it's basically a re-skinned 2003. I suppose there is nothing wrong with that but UT was more original and not just to make up for a previous bad game)

I know I said that you basically do the same thing in all GTA games. Again, I'm not ragging on it, as Zelda and Mario do that alllllllllllllllllllllll the time and I still like them

The lesson here, GTA 4, while good and all, does not deserve IGN's 10. Maybe a 9 at best. (or an 8.5 or something. I don't know, why does IGN have so many numbers in their system anyway? 7 is like a bad game to them, so what's 1-6 there for?)

edit: Apparently, a lot of people have jumped on the 10 bandwagon. I normally don't pay attention to reviews (I look at gameplay and decide for myself) but why? http://www.gamerankings.com/xbox360/933037-grand-theft-auto-iv/articles.html Here, http://www.gamefaqs.com/console/ps3/review/R125294.html Controls, driving, the minigames, customization...issues I all agree with (he didn't cover all those btw, just saying...). I don't agree with his insanely low score, but with most of what he said.
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